Adventures in Parenting

“Pick up your clothes!”

“Hurry up and finish your homework!”

“Get off the computer NOW!”

Are our children hearing negative commands from you all day?

Today is Day 14 of our 30 Days to Better Parenting Challenge. I warn you, the task today will be a real challenge.

Whenever you feel a negative statement coming out of your mouth, STOP! HOLD YOUR TONGUE!

Take a deep breath! I mean that literally. That’s what I had to do to contain myself. Most of the time I had to take several deep breaths. Or go outside and get control of yourself first.

Instead of spitting out those angry words, go up to that child, give her a hug or put your arm around his shoulder, and say, “Hey, you’re a great kid!”

Take another deep breath!

A few minutes later, come back and put your arms around him again, look him in the eye, and say nicely but firmly, “Don’t you think it’s time to do your homework? I am going to turn off the TV now.”

Think what would happen if you yell at your co-workers to do their job. What would they think of you? What do people say about bosses who scream and yell at their subordinates? They are not respected nor effective, are they? Morale tends to be low in that working environment, isn’t it?

So why do we think that as parents we think we can be effective if yell at our children?

I learned this lesson from my daughter who said to me one day, “Mom, you don’t yell at us as much as you used to.”

Ouch!

I guess I was glad I had improved, but gosh, was I yelling so much?

I didn’t realize that my children thought I yelled at them “so much”.

Negativity and yelling is neither effective nor does it create a loving home for a family.

Make it a good day today.