Adventures in Parenting

Any time you get women together, there is always great food and heart-to-heart talking.

This summer, my friends and I have been getting together to go through the book The Frazzled Female, by Cindi Wood.  Aside from the delectable food (despite the fact that we said this is not about the food!), I’ve felt refreshed after each meeting.

In my previous post, I mentioned one part of the book that talks about being positive. This is an area I really need to work on.

Being Positive Does Not Come Naturally

“When my sons were teenagers,” Cindi wrote in the book, “I knew God was telling me to be a more positive mother. He was telling me to look, speak, and act in  more positive ways. I soon discovered that being positive did not come naturally but being negative did!”

Can you relate to that? In our discussion, my friends and I soon found that many of us came from families with critical mothers. Those memories still hurt us today. Would we want our kids to say that about us one day? But growing up with negativity has carried over to us such that we need to make a conscious effort to break the cycle.

In fact, Cindi also said that “sometimes it takes sheer determination to choose to be positive. Being positive in the words we speak, the facial expressions we make, and the thoughts we think are opportunities of choice throughout any day.”

Zap Negative Thoughts!

But when our natural inclination is to point out faults, or nag at the kids, how do we curb that habit?

Here is Cindi’s advice: “When I have a recurring negative thought – you know, one that just won’t go away – I often choose to take a twenty-four hour fast on negative thinking! Here’s  how it works: when a negative thought keeps interrupting what I am supposed to be thinking about, I just ZAP it, and I keep zapping it for the entire day. ”

In order to keep that negative thought out, you have to replace it with a positive one. Cindi suggests replacing our thoughts with a Bible verse. I’ve also found it helpful to utter a word of thanks to God for something positive. Instead of grumbling when rushing with errands, I try to remember to say, “Thank you God, for giving me a car and the ability to drive.”

Each day is an opportunity to be a positive parent with the choices we make.